My baby sister is abandoning me on Thursday.
She is leaving me forever to go off to college, and who knows what kind of trouble she is going to get into. Everyone knows I am way overprotective, or you should after reading this…so I am a worried mess.
If it was up to me she’d be chained in a library at a dry campus all-girls school, with surveillance from nuns. Scratch that, because it sounds like the opening scene of some “brown-chicken-brown-cow” flick.
I have tried my best to prepare her for college, being an older sister and all.
Please don’t hate me for that Leika.
But how on earth will she ever survive without me, and my “guidance”
I don’t know either.
So I have made her a little “take care” package. My way of saying, “please don’t go but if you absolutely have to then you need to be prepared and I can help with that”.
The going-away gift contains all of the things that I never thought about buying but apparently needed once I was on my own.
I also gave her two worded advice, to help her survive.
The best way to make friends is to smell good….truth.
Having snacks is vital. You make friends by being a junk food dealer, and never go off the deep end out of hunger.
Try not to get sick…..a red, raw nose is never attractive. Streaming snot will make people avoid you at all costs.
This is more for my sanity. The girl needs good grades and solid morals, since I had neither.
I also packed a lot of personal surprises in there for her, she loves flamingos. So I included a flamingo kite, blow up flamingo, and a cookie. There’s a back scratcher, a cute planner, lots of post-its, and second-hand kitchen utensils.
The best part of this basket….her reactions.
She was a very happy sister.
“When will I fly a kite Christina?”
“Oh my gosh, it’s an edible flamingo! I can’t eat that!”
“Oh yea, that hits the spot”
“I haven’t had these since summer camp circa 1997”
“Oh man, I love trash liners”
“Now I can be as organized as you”
“We must be a fish family”
Who is excited for kitchen utensils….this girl is.
“Seriously, did dad make you put this in here?”
“Did you steal this from a hotel you cheapo”
*once I told her it was from my Birch Box, I got the reaction above. Hmmmm.
“Ummmmm, this is used. Did you really give me a burnt spatula?”
“A blow up flamingo, where do you find this crap?”
“It’s fine, I’m grateful for all the used and stained stuff. Except your sheets, that’s not ok”
“Don’t be cheap next time”
“So what are you trying to say with all the smell good stuff”
I’m not trying to say anything Leika….except that’s what they had at the Dollar Store. I’m sorry about the lint roller, but Scotch tape works just as well.
Even though she made fun of almost everything in the basket, she was very happy to get a bunch of stuff that she hadn’t even thought about.
I think she is ready.
However, I don’t think I am ready for her to be ready.
Can’t I just keep her like this forever….
Best of luck my little Leika.