For our long weekend, we decided to take a mini-vacay with the family.
It started off great, got a little bumpy, and ended with a bang.Ok seriously, if you walk into a hotel and it is swarming with tweens for any sort of event…just turn around and run. Run right out the fancy foyer and sleep in your car. You can thank me later with cookies.
We were lucky enough to be surrounded by middle school softball players for a tournament. At first, I was all googly-eyed. I always dreamed of playing on a team (any team) that got to travel and compete. They were so cute with their braids and braces, I was smitten dreaming of the day Tim and I are hauling all the kids around trying to become parents of superstars.
Then came the screaming, and the dance parties (that I wasn’t invited to), the running of the halls, and the incessant giggling. I was about to break a pitchers arm, and then it happened. While drifting off into sweet, sweet slumber. Flashing lights, blaring sirens. A late night wake up call. Furious is an understatement.
Don’t get me wrong, at fourteen I would have thought this was hilarious too. In my late twenties, watching babies crying in terror and grandmas hustling down the steps…it loses the humor. Can’t we just watch Chris Farley re-runs instead girls? I’ll pop the popcorn, you can braid my hair.
I bet those little boogers called up Mother Nature too.I know that we could have done without the late night fire alarm and the downpour, but I think this trip will go down in the books as fantastic.
I’m sure when we are eighty we will still be laughing about that silly fire drill.
Have you been on any fun trips lately?
Ever pulled the fire alarm as a prank?
Have any travel disaster stories?
This little turd has become a running joke in my life…
I had never watched the show Toddlers and Tiaras on TLC, until I got word of this chittlin….and now I. AM. HOOKED.
I suppose I am more hooked on the ridiculousness of the families than I am the actual show. I mean, just look at these crazies…good thing they had kids instead of cats. Image found here.
Tim and I have even practiced our show-parent skills and decided that if we one day (please-oh-please) have a baby girl, her name will be Gracin something Gray. Because let’s face it, Gracie Gray is pretty much the best pageant name ever. Now go practice your finger-kiss-now-finger-wave-smile-smilebigger-curtsy girl prissy walk, or something like that.
And just because we are total weirdos…here is what my boytoy and I look like as pagent queens. Please tell me how precious our spawn will be in all that glitz.
Now hopefully T won’t think he looks too good like that and leave me for the drag life. Just kidding pumpkinbutt, we know you’d never do that but just in case…I gave you the blue dress.
But here is the breaking news, the meat and potatoes and apparently Mountain Dew of this post…Honey boo boo child now has her own show. Yes indeedy, you heard me right. Image found here.
Now please tell me why I can’t have a reality show? They just give them away these days, and I know I’m funnier than J-Woww. I’m just jealous.
Gotta say, T and I are really looking forward to this disaster. Please don’t disappoint us Honey Boo Boo Child….you don’t want a sad future stage mom now, do you?
I didn’t think so. Now go get all hopped up on Mountain Dew.